STUFF Portrait Friday

Here's another fun theme for the end of the week, sponsored by Kristine.

Three things to take pictures of: The eyesore in your neighborhood, a picture taken secretly, and the most interesting/funny sign in your area.

First. Here is the eyesore in my neighborhood. This was difficult since our Home Owners Association is pretty stringent. But look! The lawn ornaments. Ack!! What? You can't see them?? There are little white bunnies along the walkway and the flowerbox along the garage window has PLASTIC flowers in it. The flag...just hanging there on the post, no pole or bracket or anything.


Second: the secret picture. I took this one on the way to Trey's school today. These guys hang out here every single day, hoping for work. They're Mexican immigrants hoping to make a buck. They stand out here for HOURS.


Third: a funny sign. This sign was on Interstate 5 for years and has even been shown on tv since it's one of those "Things that make you go hmmm".

Self Portrait Friday!

Brought to you by Katy.

Ok, so I've only played once, but here's the theme for this week: You and a friend. So many of my friends have come on gone due to the military, but this one can't leave me...I'm living in her house. BWHAHAHA!! See how tricky I am at hanging onto my friends? She's currently up in the Bay Area while her hubby is in the officer program for the Navy so we're holding down the fort while they're gone. This is Shea and I in San Francisco January 2004. I was four mos preggers with Leah and my two year old was running around the square...somewhere.


Here's our two oldest. Aren't they just beautiful? That's a clearance rack behind them, at the GAP. Not much more beautiful than that!



Here they are, waiting for us at Starbucks. These two have spent most of their childhood at the Gap and Starbucks. So sad.



Here's my honest and for true best friend:



Id'n he cute?

You should play too!

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly in no Particular Order

The Bad: My children were horrible, rotten beasts today...both of them. They seem to think that the words coming out of my mouth and my mom's mouth are akin to the teacher on Charlie Brown. So I asked my mom: "Were kids like this in the 50's and 60's?"
"No, they would just get smacked."
"Yeah, but I don't want to go to jail."

The Ugly: I have ants. Ugh!! I clean up these pests daily. I don't know what they are after as there is NOTHING on my counter or sink or floor for them to BE after, what, after cleaning them up every stinking day. They aren't outside. They are in the walls. They were coming through the space between the counter and the dishwasher. Sprayed. Then the space between the back of my Tupperware cabinet and the wall. Sprayed. Now my Tupperware is on my counter until I can get in there and remove any poisonous residue. They were coming in through a minute hole between the grout in the counter where it meets with the side of the cabinet. There must be ants in hell. They can find their way anywhere.

The Good. Bill is coming home even earlier than expected. When he left we were told he would be home on or about October 1st. Then he was approved to come home with the Advanced Party so that meant he'd be home around September 16th. Now I'm being told he'll be home no later than September 12th.

Thank you, God. I need to get out of my life for a day before I implode.

Class of 1994...Need We Say More?

I snagged this from High Maintenance Mama. Her post brought back so many memories so I decided to do it myself (one year difference).

First, go here. In the right hand corner type in the year you graduated high school. The first item returned should be the 100 songs from that year. Cut and paste them into your journal.

Bold the ones you like.
Underline your favorites.
Strike through the songs you loathe.
Italicize the ones you can’t remember.
Leave it untagged if you’re without an opinion.


Top 100 Hits of 1994 / Top 100 Songs of 1994.
1. The Sign, Ace Of Base
2. I Swear, All-4-One
3. I'll Make Love To You, Boyz II Men
4. The Power Of Love, Celine Dion
5. Hero, Mariah Carey
6. Stay (I Missed You), Lisa Loeb and Nine Stories
7. Breathe Again, Toni Braxton
8. All For Love, Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting
9. All That She Wants, Ace Of Base
10. Don't Turn Around, Ace Of Base (ok, do we see a pattern here with Ace of Base??)
11. Bump N' Grind, R. Kelly
12. Again, Janet Jackson
13. I'll Remember, Madonna
14. Whatta Man, Salt-N-Pepa
15. Wild Night, John Mellencamp and Me'shell Ndegeocello
16. Without You / Never Forget You, Mariah Carey
17. You Mean The World To Me, Toni Braxton
18. Can You Feel The Love Tonight, Elton John
19. The Most Beautiful Girl In The World, Prince Symbol
20. Fantastic Voyage, Coolio
21. Baby I Love Your Way, Big Mountain
22. Regulate, Warren G and Nate Dogg
23. If You Go, Jon Secada
24. Back and Forth, Aaliyah
25. Now And Forever, Richard Marx
26. When Can I See You, Babyface
27. Please Forgive Me, Bryan Adams
28. So Much In Love, All-4-One (Pretty sad since they PERFORMED at our grad nite at Disneyland....lol)
29. Shoop, Salt-N-Pepa
30. Any Time, Any Place / And On And On, Janet Jackson
31. Shine, Collective Soul
32. Said I Loved You...But I Lied, Michael Bolton
33. Return To Innocence, Enigma
34. All I Wanna Do, Sheryl Crow
35. Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm, Crash Test Dummies
36. Can We Talk, Tevin Campbell
37. Funkdafied, Da Brat
38. I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That), Meat Loaf
39. Gangsta Lean, Drs
40. Because The Night, 10,000 Maniacs
41. Cantaloop, US3
42. Whoomp! (There It Is), Tag Team (Sorry Manda, this song DOES remind me of you, tho...in a good way)
43. Come To My Window, Melissa Etheridge
44. Stroke You Up, Changing Faces
45. I'm Ready, Tevin Campbell
46. 100% Pure Love, Crystal Waters
47. Anytime You Need A Friend, Mariah Carey
48. Because Of Love, Janet Jackson
49. Linger, Cranberries
50. Loser, Beck
51. Found Out About You, Gin Blossoms
52. Gin And Juice, Snoop Doggy Dogg
53. Never Lie, Immature
54. Streets Of Philadelphia, Bruce Springsteen
55. Getto Jam, Domino
56. Endless Love, Luther Vandross and Mariah Carey
57. I Miss You w/ Aaron Hall 58, Understanding, Xscape
59. This D.J., Warren G60. Cry For You, Jodeci
61. Keep Ya Head Up, 2Pac
62. Who Am I (What's My Name?), Snoop Doggy Dogg
63. Another Night, Real McCoy
64. Your Body's Callin', R. Kelly
65. Tootsee Roll, 69 Boyz
66. I Can See Clearly Now, Jimmy Cliff
67. Never Keeping Secrets, Babyface
68. Crazy, Aerosmith
70. At Your Best (You Are Love), Aaliyah
71. Rock And Roll Dreams Come Through, Meat Loaf
72 Amazing, Aerosmith
73. Always, Erasure
74. Groove Thang, Zhane
75. Dreams, Gabrielle
76. Mr. Vain, Culture Beat
77. Mary Jane's Last Dance, Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers
78. Anything, SWV
79. Beautiful In My Eyes, Joshua Kadison
80. Stay, Eternal
81. Flava In Ya Ear, Craig Mack
82. U.N.I.T.Y., Queen Latifah (Who you callin' a....)
83. Prayer For The Dying, Seal
84. Secret, Madonna
85. Here Comes The Hotstepper, Ini Kamoze
86. Everyday, Phil Collins
87. Don't Take The Girl, Tim McGraw (This was my pre-Country stage)
88. Got Me Waiting, Heavy D and The Boyz
89. December 1963 (Oh, What A Night), Four Seasons
90. Indian Outlaw, Tim McGraw
91. Always, Bon Jovi
92. I'm The Only One, Melissa Etheridge
93. Back In The Day, Ahmad
94. Love Sneakin' Up On You, Bonnie Raitt
95. I'll Take You There, General Public
96. Always In My Heart, Tevin Campbell
97. What Is Love, Haddaway
98. And Our Feelings, Babyface
99. Bop Gun (One Nation), Ice Cube
100. I Wanna Be Down, Brandy

Mento(e)s, the Freshmaker

Every day I hear, "hey...you wanna play on my swingset?" And every day I say, "Yeah...hang on." Today I made him wait until Leah woke up. It's just not fair if you're sleeping and the other kid gets to do all the fun things. Plus, it bought me a few minutes before all the pushing began. Didn't I do enough pushing to get these two here in the first place??

Leah's in one of those red bucket seats while Trey is in the very big kid swing and in order to keep Leah's interest and let her know I haven't forgotten about her even though most of my attention is going to that tall blonde kid who keeps telling me "higher mommy! HIGHER!!" I'll do silly things like blow raspberries at her when she approaches or pinch her fat little calves or pinch her toes. When you do something for one, ya gotta do it for the other. I'm an only child, but I still know that rule. So what does his royal Trey-ness request? "Eat my feet, Mommy!"

"Eeeewwww!" I reply accompanied by a look of disgust on my face which makes Trey burst into a fit of giggles. Gross things are funny when you're a boy, especially when you've grossed out your mom. This goes on for five minutes. Eat my feet....eww, no....hahahaha...eat my feet....ewww, no....hahahah and so on and so forth. After my arms were too tired to push anymore we headed inside. Trey's bare feet were covered in grass clippings so I reminded him to wipe his feet as we entered the house.

"Mommy, they're all clean now. You wanna eat them?"

Hmm, at least he's hygenic.

She's so Trashy

Today was the dawning of a new day. A breakthrough. No turning back. Immediately after changing Leah's wet diaper, I wrapped it up like an origami pita chip and placed it on the coffee table while I refastened Leah's onesie. After she got off the couch (yes, I changed her on the couch...so sue me) she walked over to her diaper and picked it up. The last time she picked up her triangular, squishy diaper, it went right into her mouth as a new and fascinating teething mechanism. I was prepared to yank that thing out of her tiny grasp but this time it didn't venture up towards her little rosebud lips. She walked into the kitchen with it. And then she performed the most brilliant of all tasks amongst all that is holy in babyland. She threw it in the trash...BY HERSELF!! Ok, so this really isn't a big deal to most people but this isn't a task I've been working on with her or anything. I didn't even say, "Leah, throw it away!" in that sing songy mommy voice. She did this completely on her own and I just watched her go, silently.

Now, if I can just get her to do the dishes.

No Pain No Gain

I just tried that new Microdermabrasion stuff from L'Oreal. I must say, it's quite an experience. If you've ever eaten it at the beach where you think you've just recovered from the biggest wave you've ever survived, only to surface and before you can take a breath you get knocked down and smashed on the ocean floor, your face being dragged across the course grains of sand and salt and remnants of calcified sea creatures then you've experienced what your face will feel like as you're going through the "cleansing" part.

But then there's that part where you finally surface and can breathe and the water is calm again and the water has finally left your sinus cavities. The sun is shining and your friends are waiting for you on shore with ice cream. That's what the after part feels like. My face is smooth and clean and oh so baby soft. It really does feel like I've had a professional facial (which, by the way, I have had and man, it hurt then, too) but this was for a mere $20 AND I had a coupon for $2 off.

Bonus? $3 coupon in the package that won't expire till 2008!!

If you'd like to experience the wrath that normally occurs at San Clemente State beach and pretend to be in California for a day, I highly recommend this product.

Hello, I'm With Stupid

Today must have been Official Stupid Day. I woke up late which meant Trey got up late which meant he ate cold cereal in the car. Do you know what happens when you don't eat breakfast before school? You don't learn as much and therefore, you end up stupid.

I thought that I would run out to Wal-Mart after the kids' naps so we'd have something to do to break up the evening and I just so happened to need a few things anyway. On the way there, I was in the midst of two Honda hatchbacks driven by young men who were apparently owners of very small penises. They revved their engines and as the lights turned green they would lay a nice strip of rubber on the road, causing clouds of white smoke to billow from their tires. It was rush hour. How far did they get? Not very. Hands were thrown up, perhaps a gang sign or two. Did I mention that gas is around $2.75 a gallon? Do these people know what peeling out does to your gas mileage? Stupid. I pull into the zoo that is the parking lot at Wal-Mart and I'm unusually patient. I'm not sure why since I've decided to go to the ghetto Wal-Mart that's closest to my house and not the one I love which is brand new and shiny and clean and even has a place to get a pedicure. That's still an odd concept to me. "Welcome to Wal-Mart, would you like a flower on your toe today?" Regardless I wait patiently for someone to pull out of their spot so I can continue up the aisle and take the spot I've got my eye on. Guess who took it? That's right: Stupid. Does he not see that I have two small children in the car and am incapable of using my legs in the parking lot?? I ended up getting a better spot, right next to the handicapped spot so to you, Stupid, I say thanks.

Wal-Mart is always busy. I avoid it like the plague on the weekends because that's when the regular weirdos AND the weekend weirdos are there. I was hoping to only run into the regulars this time...which I did, and then some. Most of the weirdos I saw donned blue vests with a yellow smiley face button. Would someone please tell the balding guy with the shorn grey hair that a half inch braid down his back is not attractive? The gold teeth, the blonde with three inch roots, the guy who had a pinky nail longer than most women. Aaaaahhhh! Make it stop!!

Guess who won the stupid award? ME!! For going on payday. Did I really need mousse for $2.47? Maybe I could have waited a few days.

I Exchanged Four Large Bags of Maternity Clothes for Two Pairs of Robeez Shoes

Sounds like a great deal, huh? I had tons of maternity clothes taking up room in the garage. Bill, when you read this, you'll be happy to know that there's a big empty space in the rafters now. I am fortunate enough to have a best friend who LOVES to shop. I get my jollies shopping too, but I usually don't come home with the amount of merchandise that she does. For the duration of my pregnancies I was adorned with very cute, free, maternity clothes. I discovered Robeez while pregnant with Leah and haven't found a better shoe out there. So, the exchange of clothing that isn't mine, I don't wear any more, and free space for two pairs of the best shoes on the planet is a mighty fine deal to me. More little baby shoes will be on the way when Shea makes the trek through the grapevine and arrives home after allllll day in the car. I'm not too proud to accept hand me downs!

Now, if I can just sell enough candles to buy these and these I'll be a happy yuppie momma.

I'll Pencil You In

As the days get closer to Bill's return, the more on edge I am. I'm not nervous about him coming home. My nerves are on edge and any little thing that the kids or the cats or the telemarketers do can send me into fits of hysteria that only prescription drugs and good tequila can take away. I have house issues. If my house isn't exactly the way I want it, I'm tempted to stay home and get it just so. This isn't in a three year old's plans for life. He wants to GO. Anywhere. So the house must wait. If I can keep him occupied, great. If he's occupied with other kids, that's even better. So as my dear friend Shea gets ready to head back up to the strange part of the state, we are cramming in as much friend time as possible. We met at the park yesterday so the kids could blow off some steam. As you can see from the pictures, they are all insane.

Now, if we could just keep them locked up like this, we'd get so much done!!

This family is so giving. When we arrived, I had a Venti Iced Mocha waiting for me and as we left, Megan (the eldest wild child) gave us parting gifts:

Don't we look lovely, and slightly Hawaiian? Ok, we're waaaaay too white to look Hawaiian but it's somewhat tropical, no? Do you see Leah's pseudo black eye? She fell at least five times yesterday. The last one left her sprawled, face down at the park on that squishy rubbery stuff they put down so kids don't hurt themselves. It didn't work. She's a tough cookie and after being comforted, kept on going.

More kid fun today in the form of a lunch/pool date. I'm such the social butterfly!

Tiny Bubbles....Where's the Wine?

Friday was a busy day. I had to take Trey to school, come home to do some cleaning and then turn right back around to get Trey from school before running some errands. It's been hot and sticky. The hot part is normal, sticky...not so much. It's making me cranky. As I walk up to Trey's classroom, his teacher runs up to me with wide eyes and starts talking very quickly. The first thing I think is: 'you've got a piece of gold glitter in your eyebrow' and the second is, 'oh no, what did he do?'. All I hear is something about it's Trey's turn to take bubbles. What? No one sent me the memo about bringing in bubbles today. You aren't even studying bubbles. Am I in trouble? Is he in trouble? What the heck are you talking about, lady??? No, that wasn't it at all. It was our turn to take home the class pet, Bubbles. Sigh... Why couldn't they have asked me this this morning? Don't they know I have things to do? I replied with, "I'll have to come back for him, otherwise we'll have baked flounder in the car."

So after throwing my carefully scheduled Friday off track, we drove all the way back to the school, which by the way, is no where near on the way to or from anything and picked him up.

Do ya see him? He's that teeny tiny purpley-blue thing. I have no idea what kind of fish this is, but he was a great attention diverter for the entire weekend.
"Mommy, I wanna watch tv."
"Go see Bubbles"
"Ok!"

"Mommy, I wanna snack."
"Go see if Bubbles is ok"
"Ok!"

"Mommy, I cracked my head open on the corner of the sink."
"Well, go see if Bubbles is still swimming and then I'll look at it."
"Ok!"

Alright, so that didn't really happen but it sure did keep Trey in the dining room for a good part of the weekend.

My main concern were these two:


Fortunately for them, they didn't even realize a yummy treat was right under their noses.

By the way, that's Trey's crib before we were even able to bring him home from the hospital.
BAD Mozart!! And Autumn is waiting to use the potty, apparently.

Don't Feel Like Blogging, Read number one...

How You Life Your Life

You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside. You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think. You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences. Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.

How Do You Live Your Life?

Meow-riffic

If you have an appreciation for cats and a sense of humor, go to this site.